Teamie Spotlight Pride Edition: Kerr Holden

When did you start at Kickstart and what is your role?

I started as an editor at Kickstart back in 2016 and am now working as a Director.

How do you identify within the LGBTQIA2S+ community?

I am a lesbian transgender woman.

Are you comfortable with telling us about your journey regarding your identity? If so, was there a particular moment in your life when you started to feel comfortable with your identity? Are you comfortable sharing with us when you realized what identity you were comfortable with. Was there something that happened that triggered this realization?

From a young age I felt suspicious of the binary paradigm. Separating people in halves simply did not attribute to the vast details of beauty that compose their personalities or the sum of their desires. I spent a lot of time during my youth thinking about this and what it means to me as an individual. A lot of "normal" forms of love and being (as established by the environment around me) didn't feel like they were sufficient or filled with truth, and so I studied what others who seemed to feel similar did to make them feel good. Growing up with the internet helped a lot. I used these learnings to reflect on what would make me happiest and most able to support others. So there wasn't really a single moment where I discovered my queer values as much as it was a build over time, and I am where I am now. I simply identify as a woman because being considered a woman makes me happy.

Growing up, did you find a lot of LGBTQIA2S+ representation in the media? Did you find this more positive or negative?

I don't believe I was exposed to direct representation in the form of characters or subjects in media. Or if there was I wasn't aware of it due to the basic lack of language to identify it. I grew up watching a lot of movies from an early age, and since film works as a poetic medium I was exposed to queer ideologies through the tenderness and lively imagery of cinema. Of course though since it is poetics this impart could have been some projection from myself...

I think it was generally negative that there was not more direct LGBTQIA2S+ representation in media as a young person. It would have been much easier growing up to see depictions of others exist in a way I would like to exist in a less abstract scope. I think in general, even now, western media is poor at depicting sexuality or true love.

Who are some of your favourite LGBTQIA2S+ in the live-action community?

A few of the LGBTQIA2S+ artists I enjoy are Chantal Akerman, Lana and Lilly Wachowski, Loren Schmidt, Leilah Weinraub, and Kelley Dong.

What advice do you have for people who are struggling with their identity?

Identity is more action than it is words - there is more satisfaction in filling your desires than trying to change the minds of others. Much adversity arises when trying to change the view of the world but if you open yourself to learn from others and focus on yourself then it gets easier.

What does Pride mean to you?

Pride (as in the event) to me first and foremost represents the radical movement of individuals like Marsha P. Johnson, Zazu Nova, and Jackie Hormona to fight for trans rights and liberation. It serves as an inspiration for how actions define who we are. Its an opportunity to reflect on our individual and collective beauty and strength.

Tell us about your personal projects.

I enjoy experimenting with the moving image in general. I make short films and animations as well as some still work. I like to work with both cameras as well as computer based animation. I'm interested in pushing the form beyond established boundaries of the canon and get other people smilin' while doing it.

What sparked the idea for this project?

The intersection of the moving image as an advancement in technology and a modern form of poetics has a lot of potential for inspiring people both as creators and audience members. There's something very spiritual to me about the amount of self projection that people commit to activities like watching movies or playing video games. I myself have had my life totally changed by moving image mediums. So my inspiration is that - offering glimpses at fantasies which others can project themselves into and consider new possibilities.

What’s your idea of a perfect Sunday?

Nothin but playing video games and going for walks with my dog :)

Do you have a website or social media to showcase your artwork?

I'm not very public with my personal work yet, but once in a while throw things up on my instagram @kerr_holden